I see a medieval-looking contraption over my bed.
It is there with my approval.
It pours water and gives me my feeling.
It is controlled by me.
Each moment my alarm clock blares, I hit the Start.
I start drowning in self-loathing, self-doubt, worry and fear.
I worry what the day has in store.
I fear that I am not prepared.
Why am I not prepared?
Because I procrastinated. Because I didn’t study. Because.
That list was not completed.
I beat myself up for my lack of self-control.
For my incomplete.
I can’t even do what I can do.
What can I do?
I can doubt I am capable of handling things I already have.
These are the days I don’t do what I love.
On the days I do what I love,
I easily slide out of bed.
Ready for the day.
I lace up my sneakers anticipating the control I have on this day.
The moment I set foot on the field of play, I am in control.
Movements come so easily.
Time slows down.
I see with clarity.
I have no worries.
I have no fear.
I have no doubt I am capable of the next step.
It is just the next step.
I know what is going to happen.
I have been practicing for this moment.
This moment on the days I love.